New Year, New Start, New Me?

With a gap of 6 months, A loss of my motivation and energy has meant that I have not found the time to blog. It's all a excuse, I could have made time, I could have tried harder. When you get in a rut it is hard to pull out of it. My work has been getting me down, I seem to feel ill most days without any real cause and it has just left me lethargic and without any real commitment to anything.

So with that being said, Here is what I plan to do with the new year. January may almost be over but it has had its good points. I don't really waste my time with resolutions or promises, because I never keep them. Instead I have chosen to set myself some goals. Yes, this can easily be argued as just semantics, but I find that goals are more easily achievable than a resolution that will be over by the end of the first few weeks.

My main goal this year is to confront issues more. I have a habit of letting the things that just irritate me slide and instead of airing any issues I just get pissy and moan about it to others. Where I still maintain a good old moan can do wonders for the soul, I am no longer going to moan about things that I can not change. I am going to take charge and right what has upset me and no longer be afraid that what I feel will damage a relationship. Basically its time for me to grow up.

My next goal is to loose weight. I have no real set amount, I just want to be healthier and happier in myself. I am a fat girl, and I don't care, I just no longer want to be a size 26 and tipping the scales at over 20st. That is a shocking fact for me to admit, for me to put my weight out there to the world. The heaviest I have ever been is 20st 10lb and that was 3 years ago. Just after Christmas I got on the scales and was 20st 7lb, not the worst but a shock. I have always had a cut off point of 20st, if I go over I diet instantly. but I want that cut off point to be at least 3 stone lighter and ideally I would like to be a size 18 again, which I was 8 years ago. In 3 weeks I have lost 1st 3lb, so I am on my way. Id like to say I will stick to it, but my faith has been worn away from years of doing this. So all I want is a cut off point of 17st, to some that is still crazily fat and obese, but I am pretty happy with it as I've always been big.

My remaining goals are to get my flat the way I want it, I have started by buying a unit that actually takes all my DVDs and buying a wardrobe. We have a lot to go, but my husband and myself  have been given so much and we have been grateful, but its time to choose our own furniture and to make our flat our own. Also to blog more again, at least once a week. I also want to make the blog more personal with issues that I have gone through in my life, to be a voice to some who can't but to let others know that I am always willing to talk and an not ashamed of anything.

Hopefully with changes in my life, it will mean that my blog will also have more content and be less sporadic. If you have any issues that you want to talk about please feel free to contact me at any time.

Here's to a new year and may 2014 bring me closer to myself.