New Year, New Start, New Me?

With a gap of 6 months, A loss of my motivation and energy has meant that I have not found the time to blog. It's all a excuse, I could have made time, I could have tried harder. When you get in a rut it is hard to pull out of it. My work has been getting me down, I seem to feel ill most days without any real cause and it has just left me lethargic and without any real commitment to anything.

So with that being said, Here is what I plan to do with the new year. January may almost be over but it has had its good points. I don't really waste my time with resolutions or promises, because I never keep them. Instead I have chosen to set myself some goals. Yes, this can easily be argued as just semantics, but I find that goals are more easily achievable than a resolution that will be over by the end of the first few weeks.

My main goal this year is to confront issues more. I have a habit of letting the things that just irritate me slide and instead of airing any issues I just get pissy and moan about it to others. Where I still maintain a good old moan can do wonders for the soul, I am no longer going to moan about things that I can not change. I am going to take charge and right what has upset me and no longer be afraid that what I feel will damage a relationship. Basically its time for me to grow up.

My next goal is to loose weight. I have no real set amount, I just want to be healthier and happier in myself. I am a fat girl, and I don't care, I just no longer want to be a size 26 and tipping the scales at over 20st. That is a shocking fact for me to admit, for me to put my weight out there to the world. The heaviest I have ever been is 20st 10lb and that was 3 years ago. Just after Christmas I got on the scales and was 20st 7lb, not the worst but a shock. I have always had a cut off point of 20st, if I go over I diet instantly. but I want that cut off point to be at least 3 stone lighter and ideally I would like to be a size 18 again, which I was 8 years ago. In 3 weeks I have lost 1st 3lb, so I am on my way. Id like to say I will stick to it, but my faith has been worn away from years of doing this. So all I want is a cut off point of 17st, to some that is still crazily fat and obese, but I am pretty happy with it as I've always been big.

My remaining goals are to get my flat the way I want it, I have started by buying a unit that actually takes all my DVDs and buying a wardrobe. We have a lot to go, but my husband and myself  have been given so much and we have been grateful, but its time to choose our own furniture and to make our flat our own. Also to blog more again, at least once a week. I also want to make the blog more personal with issues that I have gone through in my life, to be a voice to some who can't but to let others know that I am always willing to talk and an not ashamed of anything.

Hopefully with changes in my life, it will mean that my blog will also have more content and be less sporadic. If you have any issues that you want to talk about please feel free to contact me at any time.

Here's to a new year and may 2014 bring me closer to myself.

New Year : New Start

A new year is a chance to take stock of what you did last year, weather you had a good or a bad year. It is the time we all look back and make goals/resolutions to change what we did not like to try and improve the year to come.

Life tends to get in the way, and I in particular, will not lie and say that I achieve my wishes. For me they normally last until March. I have recently been thinking (philosophy is not my strong point, so bare with me) that a lot of the times, I have noticed that we tend to focus on the bad things of the previous year.

We tend to make goals such as I want to loose weight, I want to stop smoking, I Will find a man, these are all things that are generally negatives that we perceived over the last year. I feel that we sometimes focus on ourselves to much, not to say that self-improvement is wrong, I'm saying nothing of the sort, all I am saying is that we always try to change ourselves and yet most of the time we fail by the middle of the new year. (to anyone who makes goals and achieves them, then I must say that I truly admire your will power)

Maybe its time we start looking at the good things, for example, if you made a new friend your resolution could be to be the best friend you could want to that person, if your family has been good to you, you could think of ways to show your appreciation. Just look at the good things and think on what you would like to continue to do for the next year.

All I am thinking is that a lot of the time making small changes stick more than big changes, so if we maybe made one big goal and the rest were positive things that we wanted to continue to bring into our lives then maybe, just maybe we wouldn't fail.

New Year Goals!

Every Year, I make new years resolutions and I normally end up breaking them by the middle of Febuary!

This year I have decided to make my normal resolutions, but treat them as a goal more than a promise. I want to loose weight and to try and text my friends more, see certain people more and make more of an effort at keeping my place clean and tidy by doing things everyday.

Its strange to think that I don't text much, but I normally only text certain friends once a week, and I really want to break the habit of round robin text to everyone just saying hey how are you?

My place is never a pigsty or really dirty, I just seem to let certain things go and build up before i do them, like putting the washing away, there are 3 loads worth sitting on the spare bed that I need to sort out and put away. I will do this today. My bf Laura, lives her life by lists and as much as I love a good list I normally end up forgetting I even have one. Most of my lists are mental ones, that I tick off once its done!

My last goal is to just be more appreciative of everything, from a roof over my head, to a warm place, to my husband and friends to always having food in the cupboard. I feel ive taken a lot for granted lately and I want to start being less expectant at these things and more happy that I have them.

What do you want to change in 2013?